ACT

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

ACT asks a different question than most approaches. Not how do we get rid of this thought, but what has trying to get rid of it cost you.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy starts from the observation that struggling with a thought tends to feed it. The more effort goes into not thinking something, not feeling anxious, or not being the kind of person who worries, the more of your attention the thing takes up. ACT calls the alternative psychological flexibility: letting the thought be there, and choosing what you do next based on something other than whether it has gone quiet.

That makes values central rather than decorative. A good deal of the work is getting clear on what you actually want your life to be about, as distinct from what you have been told it should be about, and then taking steps in that direction while the uncomfortable thoughts continue in the background. They are allowed to come along. They are not allowed to drive.

What this can look like

  • Noticing a thought as a thought rather than as a report on reality
  • Adding up what avoidance has been costing you
  • Getting specific about what you want your life to be organised around
  • Taking a small step while the discomfort is still present
  • Loosening the grip of a story you have carried about yourself for years

Is it for you

Who this tends to suit

ACT often lands well with people who have already tried to think their way out and are worn down by it. If you can argue with your own anxiety fluently and it has not helped, an approach that stops requiring you to win that argument can be a genuine relief.

It asks something in return. ACT does not promise the difficult feeling will go away, and early on that can read as giving up. It is closer to the opposite: putting down a fight you were never going to win so the energy can go somewhere you actually chose.

Often used with

Where this comes up

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